That ain't Jimmy

Jimmy Wales. This is the name of a gangster, a cockney ne'er-do-well with a chip on his shoulder and a greasy chip packet in his pocket.

Jimmy Wales is the name of a dangerous man, a man who'll do what the circumstances require, and what fate necessitates. He's not a man who dallies, nor the type to hesitate. Jimmy knows what he needs to do, and he does it.

In short, gentle reader, Jimmy Wales simply cannot be the man pictured in the above ad, which comes to us from Wikipedia. That guy's name is surely Thorn Blane or David Bureaux or Cavendish Slatesly or something. Perhaps it's White Male #567-a. He sure as hell is not Jimmy Wales. Come on. How could a low-grade hit man produce such a web-age wonder as Wikipedia?

Unless that's a disguise, and below the visage pictured, his stomach bulges out, balloon-like, and he's wearing snakeskin shoes and a pistol wedged into his waistband, this guy ain't the Jimmy I know.